Orphans on the Home Front

I had this goal to write one blog post per week.  Well it’s been two now.   Want to know why I didn’t reach my goal this week.  Allow the pictures to speak for themselves.

My "projects" stacking to uncontrollable heights. 

My never ending dishes calling for me to scrub them by hand while I count down the days til I have a dishwasher again.

And did I mention that we are packing.....again!

All of this took place while Kentucky Boy was out of town for work, for the past 10 days!

This boy in particular always keeps me on my toes. 

Don’t let the sweet smile fool you.  Allow me to introduce you to my Little Ninja.

He only has one speed

…..FAST!

He only wears one piece of clothing

…..SHORTS.  Yes I mean only shorts.  No underwear, no shirt, no socks and most of the time no shoes. 

He only plays……

 ROUGH!  He may look scrawny but he is scrappy.

He only climbs......

HIGH!  Mostly to see how loud his mother will scream when he jumps off.  

From the time he could walk, he preferred to climb rather than keep his two feet on the ground.  He takes one look at a playground and then chooses one of the hundred ways he can make it more exciting and dangerous by climbing on top of the roofs, on the outside of the fence (you know the ones put there for the purpose of keeping children from falling off), or jumping from the tallest possible elevation.  Surprisingly he is the only one of our five children we have not had to take to the emergency room yet, even though I swore he would be the first.  While he is “all boy” in every possible way, but my Little Ninja has the most tender heart.  He is the first to tell me I look beautiful or notice when I curl my hair or get new earrings.  He is helpful and kind and quick to defend someone in need.  His tender heart creates this drive in him to protect the innocent.  He is and will forever be my sweet surprise.

Anytime Kentucky Boy is gone I am reminded of my friend Jackie.  Jackie is a military wife and momma to four beautiful babies.  We became friends through a church small group and though now we are friends from afar; I think of her often when my husband is gone.  Why?  Because she taught me an important lesson, one I am still learning to this day.

When Jackie and I lived in the same town, Jackie’s husband was gone a lot.  His branch of the military required many deployments and training trips; which left Jackie home alone with three, eventually four, small children.  I remember thinking many times how hard it must be, taking care of everything at home, cooking, cleaning, laundry, putting kids to bed all day, every day with no help.  Any parent who does the bedtime routine by themselves should get a gold medal.  Can I get an Amen?   I tried to help, everything from trying to catch mice, babysitting, or inviting her over for dinner but it wasn’t until my husband left for weeks at a time to realize I didn’t do enough.  I could have done so much more, and for her kids.

I know I talk often about orphans around the world and our responsibility to care for them, to love them and feed them.  But let’s not forget the thousands of orphans and widows right out our front doors.  They may not but be true orphans or widows by definition.  But whether a parent or spouse is absent for some or all of one’s life, it creates a need.  A need that needs filled.  A need the Body of Christ can easily meet. 

Think about the single mothers and fathers in your church, workplace or neighborhood.  Think about the military spouses desperately trying to hold everything down at home, while trying to fill both parental roles.  Think about the children who need a godly role model so they don’t feel such a void when their dads or moms are away protecting our freedom.  Think about the children in foster care for another year wondering if this will finally be the year someone will want to love me.

I heard a pastor say once, “The Local Church is the Hope of the World.”  I remember thinking at the time, “I don’t truly understand what that means.”  It sounds good.  Sounds like a good church answer to many of the world’s problems.  But what does it look like? 

I think I am finally beginning to understand….

It looks like finding a single parent in your neighborhood and taking them a meal.  It looks like taking a young boy fishing.  It looks like taking out the trash and mowing the lawn for the military wife with four small children.  It looks like having a wrestling match with the little boy begging his mommy to wrestle like daddy, but no matter how hard she tries she just doesn’t wrestle like a daddy.  It looks like watching a single mom’s children for a few hours so she can go to the grocery without five little ones throwing every item they can reach into the cart.  It looks like cooking dinner or washing the dishes so a mommy has time to sit down and read her kids a bedtime story.  It looks like putting laundry away so they can actually sit on their couch.

My friend Jackie would always tell me, “I don’t want to just survive each deployment, I want to thrive.”  I am just now understanding what she meant.  She meant she didn’t want pity.  She didn't need anyone to tell her how hard military life is or give her advice on another career path for her husband so he can see his children more.  She didn't want help just to make it through this deployment.  She needed encouragement.  She needed others to help her walk the path God called her family to.  She needed others to help without her even asking. 

Her kids needed us too.  They need to know they are not missing out or hindered because of their daddy’s job.  They all need to see the Church in action.  To see the Church stepping in, when their dads or moms step out, whether good reasons or poor.  They need to know God is with them and He wants them to thrive, to bloom where they are planted.  That’s why He gave us each other, The Church.  We are their hope.  The Church is MY hope.

When my husband is gone I don’t need you to tell me how hard it must be, I already know that.  I don’t need you to tell me how much he misses in our kids lives or how hard it must be on them.  Are those things real?  YES.  But that’s not what I need to be reminded of.  What I need is the Church.  I need the Church to lift up my arms when I can’t hold them up any more.  I need the Church to help me encourage my kids, to tell them from this young age God has given them an opportunity to see their hope lies not in a parent, house, or job but their hope always lies in a Person.  His name is Jesus and He is always more than enough.  He will fill every void.  He will meet every need.  He will always provide, protect and pursue.  He is the Rock they can set their feet on.

God gives us the grace to walk out the calling He gave to us, but He never intended for us to walk alone.  We need each other.  I might not ever ask you to come wash my dishes, but come wash them anyways.  I might not ever say please bring me food so we don’t have to eat cereal for supper…again, but bring a meal anyways.  My son might not ask you to throw a baseball with him, but invite him anyways.  My daughter might not ever ask you to take her to a daddy/daughter dance but invite her anyways.

Don’t wait for someone else to step up.  Don’t wait, just look around.  I guarantee the search will be short to find someone who needs a little hope today.  Surprise them.  Step out of your comfort zone and do something ordinary with extraordinary love.  You might just be someone’s sweet surprise.